From brakes to breaks

First i would to thank the glorious asshole who decided today was a fine day to attempt a feeble, backward, retarded break in and entering, and quite possibly stealing my not so loved, ridiculously money attention seeking car.

But instead of making off with my car, you decided that it was too difficult. What a professional you must be. In case you are literate enough to find this post, in a blog that gets updated, oh every once a century, in the sea of blogs on this ocean of a site - fuck you! And fuck you kindly, why, because you just stuck me with one more stupid bill. Congratulations would be thief, you have just made it onto my shitlist. When i become emperor of the world you will taste my wrath. I'll have you cum into a cup for artificial insemination, impregnate a woman thief with it, so you can have little thieves and then I'll have you all beaten and raped by pygmies. Because God knows, you're parents don't deserve it. After all, they may actually be law abiding innocents whose only mistake was to have a woeful misbegotten son (assuming you are a man, i can't tell because what man would leave stealing my car - your job - half done) such yourself.

Second, i would like to sing an ode to my car, the recently broken into Killer Chin Chin La. Sung to the tune of "Que sera, sera."

When you were braking ridiculously juddery,
I asked myself, what should i do?
Should i sell you? Or should i fix you?
This is what i said to me...

I'll fix you again!
Because i am notmadeofmoneyandcan'taffordanythingunlessisellyou!
I was foolish enough to think you loved me.
And now you're new brake discs and brakes have taken a shit on me too. [End song]

Yes, once again, in its brilliant sense of humor, my car has decided to make me look like a goomba. After RM1000, i might still have to get new discs or machine them and most likely get new high temperature pads. Oh, that should set me back another GAZILLION DOLLARS!

Fuck you car. Fuck you! You can't barely beat a B16A Civic. I'm so glad i fart into your seats often!